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1. Had a guy come in with a raging hard on that wouldn't go away. Priapism for those that enjoy science. I had to hold this guys throbbing boner while a resident stabbed it with needles trying to drain it and inject medications to make it go down. After 8 stabs, no luck. Dude went to surgery and was told he will never have an erection again. I was the last person to hold his functional wiener. PSA- if you've had a four hour long stiffy, get to the ER in a jiffy.
2. I had to stand there while some lady told me I was incompetent for not being able to make her steak sandwich medium rare.
I was working at Subway.
3. Used to work retail security, got threatened by a junkie with a dirty needle over a Friends box set...
That was my last day.
4. Helping the coroner move a decomp on a hot August day. (Police officer).
5. I'm a "helper" for people with mental disabilities.
Have you ever pulled a turd out of a man's a** when he is stuck halfway through his pooping?
Have you ever woken him up to find he has smeared sh*t all over his face like war paint?
Have you ever been jabbed in the eye because you made him eat his vegetables?
Have you ever had to convince someone with paranoid schizophrenia that you were, in fact, real and not a hallucination while they held a knife?
11.50 per hour
6. Worked retail, worked night fill as assistant manager, assistant day manager thought he was god's gift to women.
During stocktake (when both night and day staff are in store) walked in on said manager trying to force himself on a night fill staff member. Pulled him off her, got punched in the face and chest multiple times. filed a police report.
Was then written up for not 'escalating' the incident to upper management instead of reporting the rapist prick to the police. Flipped them the bird and told them to f*ck off. Was really tempted to deck the dude on the way out, but instead went and filed a second police report for assault (on myself) and got his ass fired by regional management who some how knew nothing about this whole thing until the police called them.
Gave up on retail at that point and went back to university.
7. Used to work as a paramedic/ER Tech. Had a homeless man come in with a narcotics overdose. He was given Narcan to reverse the effects of the drugs. Safe to say he was not happy. He assaulted one of the nurses which led to him being restrained to the bed. He began screaming at everyone that entered the room that he was "gonna kill 'em." After about 10 minutes of this, he scoots to one side of the bed, and sticks his ass in between the railings. He then projectile sh*ts all over the computer, the walls, chair, and floor. There was just so much poo. I, along with others, had to go in there and clean him/some of the room up. Thankfully housekeeping took care of the floor. I literally said, "I don't get paid enough for this sh*t."
8. When the lady at the table I was serving complained because the ice in her glass of ice water had melted and the water was "too watered down for her liking".
9. Me and 3 others got the sh*t kicked out of us in a small horse stall by 5 emus we were trying to deworm. Not worth $8 an hour.
10. Right now.. I'm on hour 12 of what is shaping up to be a 16-18 hour day, and I'm fixing the mistakes of someone who gets paid at minimum 40k more than me.
11. I worked at a gas station in my teens. Lived on my own, needed the money, and there weren't many options in my area for someone my age. Every week I'd clock in a minimum of 50 hours and only ever get paid for 30-38 hrs. They kept saying they'd fix it, it never got fixed. I worked double shifts regularly and got called in every single day off I had scheduled. Every one. I couldn't afford caller ID at the time (this was before it was standard) so on my day off, I had to stop answering the phone because simply telling them I couldn't make it in would result in them calling all. f*cking. day. Then, since I lived so close by, they started sending other employees to my apartment. Most of them felt bad about it, and eventually refused but then the manager and district manager started showing up, pounding at my door, pleading with me, slipping notes under my door, and trying to guilt trip and threaten my job safety. I can't even begin to explain the toll that took on me, physically and mentally. I stopped menstruating (TMI, sorry) and actually started losing my hair. But, I needed the money.
My breaking point was shortly after I'd already quit once. The first time was because I'd requested my birthday off, they approved it, and then the day before told me I'd need to come in. I said no and stood my ground. The manager eventually agreed to figure something else out. Birthday comes around and my phone gets blown up by every on duty employee and one off duty. I finally tell the boss they can leave me alone for the rest of the day or I quit. He replies "Well... we're going to need you to come in still." So I quit. I got rehired the next day after I plugged my phone back in (because quitting didn't stop the calls) by the district manager who begged me to stay and promised to have the store back off when I had a free day.
A few weeks later was Easter. I'd surprisingly been given it off, and was excited to finally get to spend a holiday with my family. That morning I woke up to the phone ringing. And ringing. And ringing. It was 6:30 AM. I am not a morning person. I answered, told them no, and ignored the barrage of calls that continued until I went out the door. About an hour after I got to my Mom's, the calls started there. I'd never given them her number. I refused, asked them not to call there again and hung up. My mom answered and asked them not to call back. My step dad answered and threatened to call the cops for harassment. They wouldn't stop. We had to unplug all the phones for dinner and I was terrified they were going to show up there too. As soon as the phone reconnected, the calls started again. That's when I finally snapped. I answered and told the boss every possible way to go f*ck himself. He eventually hung up on me so I called his a** right back and continued. I didn't just quit, I unhinged. I kept calling until they took their phone off the hook. Then I (kind of) enjoyed the rest of my Easter evening. I've had my share of sh*tty jobs before and since, but nothing that compares to that place.
12. Mental health nurse here. I witnessed this but it didn't happen to me. One day on shift I responded to a duress alarm on another ward (1 nurse from each ward responds to duress from any ward). A female patient on a psychiatric intensive care unit had become violent and and could not be deescalated. It was decided that physical restraint and intramuscular medication would be needed to settle her down.
Anyway, as the team of 5 nurses approached her she was standing there with her legs apart and shouting at us. Just as we stepped into her space to initiate the restraint she stuck her fingers into her vagina (she was menstruating at the time) and managed to stick them into the mouth of one of the female nurses doing the restraint. The patient was extremely amused. Nurse vomited after the restraint and had to leave for the day.
That's just one of the really bizarre moments I have experience since working as a mental health nurse.
13. When I had to clean poop of a very confused lady who thought I was forcing her to have an abortion. She was kicking and screaming every time anyone came near her with a wash cloth. When we got her her in the shower room to clean her she was was grabbing hand fulls of her own poop screaming "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BABY".
14. When a thick stream of sweat drained out of this girls cell phone case. I had to explain to her that her phone had water damage and that she shouldn't work out with her phone in her bra, all the while trying to be professional and not gag while cleaning the mess. (I sold phones at Sprint).
15. I was a rookie wild land fire fighter making ten/eleven bucks an hour, and I seriously questioned why I only got paid that much, particularly that one time that I had to hold two hundred yards of road with nothing but a tool, and two other rookies who were pissing their pants, when a wall of flame hit our line and started throwing spots into the tall grass we were standing in. Luckily a brush truck arrived before we lost most of our facial hair, and we made it out alright.
16. Library. Found a used nappy (diaper) crammed in behind the books in the picture books area. Not the first time I'd found one, but the first one I'd found folded sh*t side out.
17. I worked as a cook at a restaurant that doubled as a night club after dark. A guy got shot and killed on the front landing one night and the next day they expected me to clean up the f*cking murder scene.
18. Cable guy here:
You know that really run down trailer park with hundreds of cats running around unchecked outside? The one that's full of rust bucket trucks with confederate flags painted on the tail gate? When the wind blows you are overwhelmed by the scent of cat urine..... I go into those trailers and dig through piles of garbage/diapers/animal and human s**t all because "my Fox News pixelated once during the debate" only to find the customer had spliced in their own line because they wanted tv in the rest of the trailer.
I then have to crawl under the trailer and run a new line to replace the one they f**ked up, all the while being told how I'm a piece of sh*t because Im following company policy that you pay for every room you have tv in. Also here's 2 dead cats and a black widow colony that I carefully avoid, until I am backing out (because you don't have room to turn around under a trailer) and my boot goes into the web. I do all of this just so they can have cable for the 3 months until they get disconnected for not paying the bill and switch to dish.
It was a long day.
19. When I got texts like these from my boss' boss' boss.
For anyone (men can get harassed too) facing this kind of harassment, don't quit until you have another job secured, especially if you're reporting it to HR. HR departments from different companies talk to each other, and you will not believe how hard it is to find a job when you have develop a reputation as a "trouble-maker", "attention wh*re", "c*cktease", "sl*t", etc. HR is there to protect the company, not you. So no matter how close you think you are to HR, expect some sort of backlash.
The more senior the person is, the more likely they are to have gotten away with this for a looonng time. There's safety in numbers so if you can find other men/women that have faced the same harassment from the same guy (you will), report in a group and make sure everything is documented. S/he could still get away with it, but it'll be harder when there's more evidence. One person can be branded a "sl*t" but multiple people? HR must have awesome hiring policies.
20. I was working at a gas station on Halloween. Pretty normal night, a bit more beer than usual. And then I see some kid walk by with his collar pulled up, he's walking a little odd. Then he walks back the way he cames which is a little weird. Then I notice his friends walking up. I 'm looking at them and I see one is wearing a mask. Then I see a fire extinguisher in his hands. I start moving to the switch that controls the electric locks but sadly I reached it half a second too late. Two kids hold the doors open and this little sh*t unloads an entire fire extinguisher into the store. Can't see sh*t, the entire store is filled with powdery haze. It took 8 hours to clean up. Eight hours closed for a 24 hour gas station. And it turns out, the whole point was to steal an 18 rack of f*cking keystone. F*cking kids.
21. Accidentally Poking myself with a needle that was just used on an hiv positive person
22. While working at an adult video store, I discovered a bucket of dehydrated piss in the broom closet. For a moment, I tried to summon a normal reaction of disgust or anger, but I felt nothing but indifference. The piss bucket wasn't what broke my spirit.. it was what made me realize I had no more spirit to break.
23. Was flying a jet full of tech people to SXSW. 8 Seats on the plane and they were all full. First thing in the morning, the passengers started having drinks. 2 hours into the flight someone taps me on the shoulder and says "Captain, the toilet isn't working."
It was working just fine, but the tank was "at capacity." We could either land the plane and delay for a while, or they could hold it. Meanwhile, I had to pull on some rubber gloves, grab the knife from the bagel tray, and try to go Super Mario on the airplane's lavatory.
So there I was at 41,000' plunging a toilet with a plastic knife thinking, "I'm too old for this sh*t."
24. Was a manager at a McDonald's and I got screamed at by our district supervisor, mid shift, for putting too many ketchup packets in a bag through the drive thru.
25. I recently had to climb into a 7ft deep pit that was covered by a grate to remove lead paint from a window. The pit was obviously breeding ground for spiders. There were thousands of them... Thousands..
26. cleaning diarrhoea off the walls of a bathroom stall 3 times in one night.
27. I'm a mental health counselor at an eating disorder facility. We had a new patient arrive who previously came from a sober house and was homeless so he brought all his belongings with him, which was around two large suitcases of clothing. He stayed in program for roughly 36 hours than quickly discharged himself without much of an explanation or plan on what to do (he was from across the country).
My coworker and I go into strip and remake his bed, after he had already left, and we find BOXES full of purge (like nature valley boxes but costco size) and one suitcase full of purge and a bunch of clothes still soaking wet, full of purge. Also found some of his purge-covered clothes outside the window, which we went to go dispose of. Those had mats all around them and i learned that maggots show up pretty fast when you leave vomit in 90 degree heat. We both look at each other and were like "....this is waaaay above our pay grade."
I wish that was the grossest story. Just the first one that comes to mind.
28. I was on a phonecall for 22 hours.
Twenty. Two. Hours.
Long story. I was in a security team that did a lot of hand-holding tech-support kinda stuff because we didn't trust anyone. At some point it was a HUGE mess with me being the only guy and me being abused horribly. Eventually my boss and I managed to get some ground-rules in - no upgrades without telling us 3 days in advance. No calling SterlingPhoenix with no good reason. SterlingPhoenix is allowed to hang up on you if you do not give him anything to do, etc.
Then my boss quit, and we got a new boss who didn't enforce anything and did not have my back.
These people set an implementation for like 10pm, and told ME about it at 4pm. Which is way less than 72 hours. I told them hey, tough luck. And my boss goes "Oh you're helping them or else."
So I worked with them all night, then they paged me back in the next day, and my boss pretty much threatened to have me continue to work with them (and a lot of this was just me being on the phone and them saying I can't hang up "just in case"). Finally got to leave at 2am.
...and yet it took me years after that to actually quit.
29. When my assh*le patient pointed his finger at me angrily and said, "Your job is to serve me." No one has ever talked to me that way in my life. How dare someone speak to me that way who is depending upon me to make sure they don't bleed out after their heart catheterization and advocate on their behalf to the physicians.
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