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31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

In case anyone needed a refresher course on the nightmare fuel that is the 'Animorphs' book series.

By zachnading

Published 2 years ago in Funny

While exploring the ocean for the source of a strange alien signal, the Animorphs, in the forms of dolphins, save a humpback whale from a shark attack. Marco gets his tail bitten off and nearly bleeds to death.

In case anyone needed a refresher course on the nightmare fuel that is the 'Animorphs' book series.

A massive shoutout to Pop Arena on Twitter for this incredible thread and trip down memory lane.
  • 1

    Flea-sized aliens called Helmacrons show up and shrink the Animorphs down, and they fight on top of the vice-principal's head.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 2

    Cassie has a nervous breakdown over all the murder she's committed over the last year, and quits the Animorphs. We meet our first good Yeerk, bringing into question the ethics of painting one side of a war as "all bad."

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 3

    David turns on the other Animorphs, killing a red-tailed hawk that he thinks is Tobias and cutting Jake's throat as a lion. To be concluded.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 4

    Rachel bonks her head and gets amnesia. She wanders the woods for a bit, until finding an old woman in a shack. The woman locks Rachel and sets the shack on fire. Meanwhile, there's a dust monster from Saturn attacking things.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 5

    The Animorphs find two free Hork-Bajir, innocent herbivore aliens that the Yeerks turned into violent shock troops. To prove that they're no longer possessed by Yeerks, one rips its own skull open and exposes its brain.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 6

    The Animorphs discover that instant oatmeal is an incapacitating drug to Yeerks, and they debate the ethics of using narcotics as a weapon.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 7

    A pacifist alien robot dog is forced to reprogram itself to save the Animorphs, and it commits acts so gory and violent that everyone is traumatized, including the robot.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 8

    While exploring the ocean for the source of a strange alien signal, the Animorphs, in the forms of dolphins, save a humpback whale from a shark attack. Marco gets his tail bitten off and nearly bleeds to death.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 9

    Due to a sci-fi allergic reaction, Rachel gives birth to crocodile just before she's about to go on a talk show with dollar store Jonathan Taylor Thomas.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 10

    The Animorphs break into Area 51 to steal a piece of alien technology before the Yeerks can get it, only to discover that it's just an alien toilet.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 11

    Marco discovers that his mother, who he thought died in a boat accident, is alive and is the host body of Visser One, the leader of the alien invasion. The Animorphs find themselves in a political chess match between Visser One and Visser Three.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 12

    The Animorphs are accidentally teleported to an aquatic planet full of psychic frog aliens. Our heroes help the Andalites blow up an entire continent.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 13

    David kills Jake and Rachel's cousin and dumps the body in a hospital elevator shaft. The Animorphs trap David in the form of a rat and leaves him screaming on a cluster of rocks in the middle of the ocean.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 14

    The Animorphs are forced into a war game between Space Jesus and Space Satan. They discover that Satan's warriors, the Howlers, are mentally children who think they're just playing a game as they violently murder everything in their path.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 15

    The Animorphs are trapped in the Late Cretaceous period, where they find Earth occupied by peaceful crab aliens who brought broccoli to the planet. Tobias drops a comet on them, killing both the crab aliens AND the dinosaurs.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 16

    Trapped in the arctic circle, the Animorphs discover that the Yeerks have been genetically splicing human and alien DNA, creating a race that melt at room temperature. It's as horrifying as you're imagining right now.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 17

    Ax, a young Andalite trapped on Earth and working with the Animorphs, is in conflict with his human allies because he comes from an isolationist, xenophobic culture, even after they take him to the movies and let him eat popcorn off the theater floor.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 18

    Elfangor, a dying Andalite alien who gives our protagonists their super powers, is killed when Visser Three, an evil alien possessing a body of another Andalite, turns into a giant monster & graphically eats Elfangor.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 19

    Jake gets swatted as a fly and nearly dies. We learn that Bill Gates is Visser Three's twin brother, and is also a Yeerk cannibal who finds his victims as an internet predator.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 20

    Tobias learns that Elfangor is his father. A baby Hork-Bajir becomes an exhibit at a rundown miniature golf course.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 21

    Another prequel book, we see Alloran, the host body for Visser Three, nearly wipe out the Hork-Bajir with sci-fi biological weapons. The book as a whole is basically James Cameron's Avatar.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 22

    The Yeerks are running experiments on sharks by implanting sci-fi devices in their heads. The Animorphs accidentally get these devices implanted in them, and if they morph anything relatively small, their heads will explode.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 23

    The Animorphs fight their way up a tower full of bad guys. Marco, in the form of a gorilla, gets his stomach sliced open, and Rachel, in the form of a grizzly bear, gets one of her paws sliced off. They're here because Space Jesus showed them a Yeerk weak spot.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 24

    Jake gets possessed by a Yeerk alien, and the Animorphs are forced to starve it out. With a dying slug in his brain, Jake finds himself in a state between alive and dead, and himself staring face-to-face with Space Satan.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 25

    The Animorphs recruit a boy named David after he tries to sell discovered alien tech on eBay. David seems a bit to eager to kill things. To be continued.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 26

    In retrospect, for 'The Predator' I should have brought up when they morphed ants and experienced terrifying ego death as they turned into colony insects. They're forced into a similar situation here, turning into termites. Animal-lover Cassie is forced to kill the queen.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 27

    In this prequel book, Elfangor's best friend Arbron gets stuck in the body of a Taxxon, a giant alien centipede with insatiable, perpetual hunger. Elfangor then deserts his post and hides as a human on Earth, where he co-creates Windows OS.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 28

    Tobias, a boy who gets permanently stuck in the body of a red-tailed hawk, finally gives in to his animal instincts and kills and eats a rat. This sends him spiraling into a crisis of identity, and he attempts suicide in a shopping mall.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 29

    Rachel, a thirteen-year old girl, gets chased in an alleyway by an aggressive rapist, where she turns into an elephant and scares him off. The rest of the team admonish her for this.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 30

    After crash landing in the Amazon rainforest, an unconscious Rachel gets ripped apart by a swarm of ants. All the Animorphs die violently, but are saved thanks to time travel shenanigans (but still have full memories of dying violently).

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

  • 31

    Remember the pacifistic robot dogs? They have a ship on the bottom of the ocean, and it looks like Snoopy for Peanuts.

    31 ‘Animorphs’ Book Plots That Are Pure Chaos

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