Some people go into politics to serve the people. Others? To serve themselves a standing ovation.
These are the politicians who looked at a budget meeting and said, “You know what this needs? A guitar solo.” The ones who couldn’t resist turning every speech into a dramatic monologue, every campaign rally into a personal Woodstock; minus the talent, plus the teleprompter.
They didn’t just want votes. They wanted groupies. And while the rest of us tried to follow the issues, they went out there kissing babies and mirrors, tossing out catchphrases like confetti and showing up to debates like it was their album release party.
Did they changing the world? No. But they definitely thought so.
Click through for a cringeworthy backstage pass to the politicians who confused democracy with a world tour. Spoiler: no one asked for an encore.
1
Mayor Eric Adams
Brooklyn’s own swagger champ, who’s got subway breakdancer vibes but somehow still can’t remix the pothole playlist. Lead singer? Nah, more like backup dancer stuck in rush hour.
2
Donald
The human glitter bomb who treats every press briefing like a Vegas show, but forgot that charisma isn’t measured in golf trophies or tweets. Vegas called. They want their cringe back.
3
Jair Bolsonaro
Brazil’s political mosh pit, the human embodiment of a bar fight where nobody remembers who started it. Spoiler: It was him.
4
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
The progressive mic-drop queen who types faster than she thinks and sometimes sounds like she’s live-tweeting Wikipedia entries.
5
Volodymyr Zelensky
From punchlines to power plays, proving if you can fake laugh on stage, you can fake running a country under fire.
6
Silvio Berlusconi
Italy’s political showman who treated governance like a reality dating show and left the audience hitting “next episode.”
7
Sarah Palin
The maverick with catchphrases stuck so hard in the past, they make elevator music sound like a punk anthem.
8
Boris Johnson
The UK’s wild-haired frontman who looks like he lost a fight with a hairdryer and sings Brexit off-key like it’s karaoke night gone wrong.
9
George W. Bush
exas twang meets awkward charm, like a bad country concert you can’t stop watching.
10
Justin Trudeau
The scarf-wearing, selfie-loving liberal prince who thinks a good pose counts as political power. Vogue called, they want their model back.
11
Vladimir Putin
The ultimate Bond villain wannabe, with macho posturing that’s all show and no script.
12
Nancy Pelosi
The queen of the iconic clap heard ’round the world, mostly because everyone’s trying not to cringe.
13
Alexei Navalny
Russia’s rebel frontman balancing viral fame with “please don’t disappear” realness.
14
Barack Obama
The smooth crooner of politics who could sell out stadiums with speeches, until the mic dropped and the real work began.
15
Donald Rumsfeld
The mysterious “known unknown” guy who talks like he’s hosting a conspiracy podcast nobody asked for.
16
Marine Le Pen
The far-right diva starring in a political soap opera no one wanted to binge-watch.
17
Nancy Reagan
The original political glam icon who probably spent more time on her hair than her husband did on policies.
18
Joe Exotic
The tiger king of political chaos whose campaign was a Netflix special nobody saw coming.
19
Rodrigo Duterte
Southeast Asia’s loudest “shock rocker,” basically a chainsaw solo at a poetry slam. 100% volume, zero subtlety.
20
Kim Jong-un
North Korea’s ultimate frontman for “wait, what?” Mixing dictatorship with boy-band-level drama.
