If you believe everything you read on the internet, you probably think that every single item in your home or car is in the process of either killing you or turning you into a homosexual.

Thankfully, that’s only partially true — your home is filled with carcinogens and microplastics, but being around that stuff isn’t going to make you want to move to Berlin. Still, some people online *love* the idea that everything around us is not only destroying our lungs and brains, but taking our dicks down with them.

Take, for example, this woman, who angrily recounted on a podcast how she berated an Uber driver for his air freshener after claiming that such fragrances would turn him gay. According to her, he thanked her for the information — call me crazy, but I don’t believe her story. That said, gimme a few days alone with some pine-tree air fresheners and maybe I might!

By the way, if you’re wondering, no — there’s literally zero evidence that car air fresheners can turn you gay. Is there some evidence that some chemicals in air fresheners can impact testosterone levels? Yes, but testosterone and sexuality aren’t linked, and you’re not going to go from “straight as an arrow” to Lil Nas X just because your car smells like daffodils.

MAGA podcaster: “Your car air freshener is turning you gay.” pic.twitter.com/6C6gtHxlzP

— PatriotTakes (@patriottakes) July 17, 2025