Chicago Has Officially Responded to Rumors That There’s a Man Trapped Inside the Bean

They say there’s no one trapped in the sculpture — or is that just what they want us to think?

Published 3 months ago in Funny

Recently, Chicago’s famous Bean sculpture has been hit with a bizarre series of protests. Basically, people have been picketing the piece with signs claiming that there’s a man stuck inside of it.

How did he get in? Wrong question, bucko — you should be asking how to get him out! He’s probably starving!

The protests seem to be a joke, but the city’s response has been entirely serious. Downtown Alderman Brendan Reilly, whose district contains the Bean, says he’s been inundated with calls telling him that he must release the man stuck inside the sculpture.

“I am happy to confirm that a man has not been trapped inside ‘Cloud Gate’ (aka ‘the Bean’) for the past 21 years,” Reilly wrote in a statement.

However, the group behind the protests, the “Man in Bean Coalition,” say they’re not satisfied with this response.

“There is a man trapped inside the bean,” the group reiterated in an email to Block Club Chicago.

Personally, I’m just confused about this. Maybe people like myself who just don’t know what to think should call up Downtown Alderman Brendan Reilly — he’s a guy who I’m sure will help us figure it out.