Like any other red-blooded American, I love hibachi. The whole thing where they flip a shrimp into your mouth? Amazing. The little mechanical guy who pees all over the table to make it sizzle? Can’t get enough!

However, like all things, hibachi has a time and a place. One of those places is definitely not the home — because if you try it, you might just set off every single sprinkler in the building.

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