Daniel is the perfect example of two asshole traits: Likability; hes a mean hearted outspoken cynic who isnt afraid of calling out or laughing at anyone; regardless of race, creed, or mental handicap. But people still love him, why? Hes confident and confidence equals likability; with a smile on his face he delivers the one liner most people dont have the balls to think, let alone say out loud. Yet, everyone in the room laughs. What an asshole this guy is. I love it!
Second asshole trait: Honesty, everything he says has real conviction and whole truth: Plastic surgery gives people the rare opportunity to let their inner appearance reflect their inner appearance. Fake. Which is a positive joke for women, unless you have fake boobs. But lets be honest youre not bright enough to get that joke. How does that feel whores? Really? you did it so your shirts would fit better; you did it because youre a whore. You forgot because youre stupid. Even you are laughing why? probably because you're a whore, and its funny. Also because its brutally honest, I would expect nothing less from a true asshole. The truth may hurt but it is hysterical.
Daniel has a segment on his show just to demonstrate how much better than you he is, classic asshole; want to be like our hero? Of course you do. Good luck, he is the winning quarterback in the AssholeBowl. The best we can do is watch from our couch and try to emulate his winning character traits. He is an asshole of the highest caliber. He demonstrates everything we represent, with calm cool collected demeanor that makes him the center of every room. And for that Daniel we thank you.
In closing; I leave you with a few of my favorite Tosh quotes.
"Ahh its finally fall again; everyone can go back to being fat. Except you ladies. Think its cold being skinny? Try sleeping alone.""I'm sick of the media making female sports athletes into supermodels, when they're clearly sixes at best"
Butt sex is a lot like spinach: if you're forced to have it as a child, you won't enjoy it as an adult.
Really? You did it so your shirts would fit better? You did it because you're a whore, you forgot because you're stupid.
You'll have to excuse me for my bad posture. My mom says it's 'cause I have a huge cock. Yeah, she talks like that. She's a sailor. We don't judge her. She lives by one rule, and it's the rule of the sea.