Captain, the shook levels are off the charts!


It seems like a "female" specimen has decided to courteously exemplify a high degree of shook. Above, note how the user Tyaeda used profound language as an attempt to sound important ("shit" and "muta fucka") and as an attempt to bolster his low self confidence. 

Now, you may be wondering: what is shook? It sounds like incoherent gangster babble to me, says the neglecter ... or the spoken word of an illiterate, says the condescending intellect. Allow me to demonstrate the various levels of "shookness:" 

Level 1 - indifference (no shookness): 

This is the state that you are currently in (assuming that you aren't an irate, old, and white Republican male who vacates this blog) and you are absolutely showing no signs of shookness. You are approaching a situation without any feelings in regard to that specific situation.

Level 2 - madness (some shookness may be experienced): 

You have encountered something that has made you mad or irate - you wish to do something but you are powerless. That feeling of adrenaline flowing throughout your body via your adrenal glands while you angrily read someone's blog has some part to shookness but overall, you are just mad. 

Level 3 - shook (a healthy dosage of shookness): 

You are way past your state of madness - you can no longer cope with the statements and whatnot spewed from a blog. For example, take my blog regarding the Internet Female Beast and read the comments by a certain lot of people. They hop onto their five hundred alternate IDs and one star a blog that goes against their morals and ideals. 

Here's a real life example of shook: you are sitting in an airplane and the man next to you is slouching and is drooling onto your new shirt. In back of you, there is a screaming toddler who is valiantly kicking your seat as an attempt to cope with the change of pressure. The flight attendant of the plane refuses to serve you your meal despite your raging hunger and you really have to go to the bathroom but a corpulent slob clogged the toilet. That feeling of disgust, anger, fear, and other emotions is shookness - you do not know what to do, where to go to, or how to settle the current issue at hand.

Level 4 - super shook (overdosage of shookness, see your therapist): 

You are so shook that you cannot handle the overbearing levels of shookness and you are on the verge of IP tracing the creator of a blog, locating the person's house, and killing the person with a rusty spoon. People who are experiencing super shookness may witness the following: dilated pupils, diarrhea, rapid heart rate, uncontrollable urge of contemplating ways to kill your target, and possibly death.

If you are under the super shook spell, consult your therapist immediately. You must either lower your levels down to shook or maybe even lower than that to fully mend the problem. Tyaeda's post above is on the verge of spilling over onto this level but she reluctantly refused to include terms such as "im gonna skull fuck you" or "im going to split your penis in half from your urethra." 

Level 5 - ??? (death)

The only person who managed to surpass the levels of super shook was Abe Vigoda and he is dead. 
Uploaded 07/11/2011
  • 0 Favorites
  • Flag
  • Stumble
  • Pin It