eBaum's Grand Blog Story, Volume I

All right, welcome to eBaum's Grand Blog Story, Volume I.

With much anticipated (I hope) fanfare, I will now start the story.  The lucky eBaumer whose word combination I chose to begin is....


Besides his use of the whitey-froed Bob Ross as his avatar, I thought that his word combo would make for an interesting few sentences.  His words are (edited to fit your screen), hanger, q-tip, shop vac, adult diaper, and ball gag.

So without further ado, let's start the show!


   I was cleaning out my garage the other day.  I had been putting it off, because, well, it's so cold outside that I went to have a smoke, and one of my nuts ended up breaking off and landing in my sock.

   But I had the day off and was bored, so I did up my coat and headed out.  I picked up some tools and put them away, swept up some leaves and other junk that had blown in, and finally got around to my workbench.  I had been cutting some flooring lately, and that on top of some other work I had put off from last summer had deposited a considerable amount of sawdust on and around the bench.  So I pulled out my handy dandy shop vac.  I thought something didn't feel right when I picked up the hose, but it didn't register until I turned the bastard on and it screamed like a Yamaha wound out in third gear that something was stuck in the hose.

   I put the hose up to my eye to see what was stuck.  After nearly losing my eyelid I remembered to turn the stupid thing off.  I unhooked the hose and shook it - nothing but a stained q-tip and some dust.  Finally I grabbed an old wire hanger and started to root around.  It took a little while, but I finally got it cleaned out.

   I decided that while I was at it, I should open up the canister and empty it out.  Now, I've picked up a lot of strange shit with a shop vac, but imagine my surprise when I look into the canister and see a ball gag and an adult diaper - used, no less.  After barely controlling the urge to add the contents of my stomach to the mess contained within my favorite garage tool and slamming the lid back on, I looked up and saw...



I will offer people the chance to write the next section in line, and send them a list of words for them to use from the suggestions that I receive.  If you are chosen(don't worry, I'll spread it around) I will pm you the previous sections, you can pm me back with yours, and I will put them all together in one big blog.  Thanks to strghtjcktgrl for bringing that up.

I've made the offer to GregFafashoonoo to continue, and I hope he accepts.  Check back for more hilarity!

Uploaded 01/24/2009
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