FRINGE, STATION, CHIMNEYS, MUSHROOM
Majorfathead
Published
04/19/2011
As I've stated before here I travel for work and that gives me the opportunity on the weekends to explore parks, historic sites and what not.
So I was in the Okeechobee Fl wildlife preserve( Everglades) at the ranger station looking at hiking trails that would allow me to safely experience some of the amazing Florida wildlife without being in too much peril. After picking a route and going through the standard lecture on not straying from the marked trails (there's bears and lions and gators in them there hills) I set out.
It's mid winter here in FL so the weather is in the low 70's and extremely dry, and as I'm hiking down the trail I spy smoke about 1/4 mile off the trail so I decide to check it out and make sure there is not a fire brewing up (in hindsight probably not the smartest thing to do). I make my way past a cypress hammock and around a small pond and see a small hill a little way off and that is where the smoke is coming from. I make my way to the hill and as I get closer I notice rings of mushrooms each with chimneys merrily belching smoke.
"What the hell?" I say to myself, I've read plenty of fantasy fiction and I know that mushroom rings and the like are indications of the Fae. "This can't be happening to me" I think as I go closer to investigate. I notice an annoying tinny sounding music that is just above my hearing threshold and that all of the background wildlife noises have stopped. "That's some weird goddam music" I remark to no one in particular but continue on towards the hill and see a door clearly cut into the hillside with a bright red door.
"In for a penny, in for a pound" I declare as I walk up to the door and knock on it.
The door is thrown open, a horrible stench flows out, and I see a small Asian man/woman dressed entirely in lace clothing with a fringe shawl, eating what looked like a rotten mushroom, surrounded by a blue electronic glow.
"Are You one of the Fae? I ask.
"No I am a troll!" It declares.
"What the hell kind of a troll are you?"
"The best kind approved by everyone who matters"
Unimpressed and revolted by the smell I said no more, as I turned to leave the annoying tinny music got louder, and the man/woman started to spew gibberish about being a great musician and the best uploader and blogger ever (or some shit like that). Then it began to scream at me that everyone loved him/her and I should come back and be his/her friend.
Well, I'm not to proud to say that I ran right through the pond (no fears about gators by this point) and sprinted all the way back to the Ranger station.
Now that I know what kind of weirdness lives in the Fl Everglades, I can honestly say I will never ever go back again
.I wonder how many of these weird Asian man/woman things there are in holes underground spread around the world?
True Story
MjrF
So I was in the Okeechobee Fl wildlife preserve( Everglades) at the ranger station looking at hiking trails that would allow me to safely experience some of the amazing Florida wildlife without being in too much peril. After picking a route and going through the standard lecture on not straying from the marked trails (there's bears and lions and gators in them there hills) I set out.
It's mid winter here in FL so the weather is in the low 70's and extremely dry, and as I'm hiking down the trail I spy smoke about 1/4 mile off the trail so I decide to check it out and make sure there is not a fire brewing up (in hindsight probably not the smartest thing to do). I make my way past a cypress hammock and around a small pond and see a small hill a little way off and that is where the smoke is coming from. I make my way to the hill and as I get closer I notice rings of mushrooms each with chimneys merrily belching smoke.
"What the hell?" I say to myself, I've read plenty of fantasy fiction and I know that mushroom rings and the like are indications of the Fae. "This can't be happening to me" I think as I go closer to investigate. I notice an annoying tinny sounding music that is just above my hearing threshold and that all of the background wildlife noises have stopped. "That's some weird goddam music" I remark to no one in particular but continue on towards the hill and see a door clearly cut into the hillside with a bright red door.
"In for a penny, in for a pound" I declare as I walk up to the door and knock on it.
The door is thrown open, a horrible stench flows out, and I see a small Asian man/woman dressed entirely in lace clothing with a fringe shawl, eating what looked like a rotten mushroom, surrounded by a blue electronic glow.
"Are You one of the Fae? I ask.
"No I am a troll!" It declares.
"What the hell kind of a troll are you?"
"The best kind approved by everyone who matters"
Unimpressed and revolted by the smell I said no more, as I turned to leave the annoying tinny music got louder, and the man/woman started to spew gibberish about being a great musician and the best uploader and blogger ever (or some shit like that). Then it began to scream at me that everyone loved him/her and I should come back and be his/her friend.
Well, I'm not to proud to say that I ran right through the pond (no fears about gators by this point) and sprinted all the way back to the Ranger station.
Now that I know what kind of weirdness lives in the Fl Everglades, I can honestly say I will never ever go back again
.I wonder how many of these weird Asian man/woman things there are in holes underground spread around the world?
True Story
MjrF
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