I had some spicy food for dinner last night, so all day today at work I'm dropping bombs like there's no tomorrow. I figure since I'm in this predicament, I might have well have some fun with it.
Every time I've felt a gaseous expulsion coming on, I've called someone into my office under the pretense of requiring assistance, or information.
My manager came in and almost threw up, but never said a word.
I called the secretary in. Her eyes welled up with tears, but she never complained about it.
One of the guys from the shop came in, turned a little green and jittery, but stayed until he was satisfied that he gave me the information I required.
The guy from Fedex came into my office and asked me to sign for a parcel. I hadn't farted for about an hour at this point, but sure enough he blurted out, "Jesus Christ! What the fuck died in here?"
Up to this point, I was able to keep a straight face with everyone, but now I burst out laughing. The dude must have thought I was nuts due to the fact that I could not say a word, how hard I was laughing. If it smelt that bad after not having farted for so long, I can't imagine how bad it was for everyone else.
What is the human characteristic that allows us to wallow in our own stench, without even flinching?
What is the human characteristic that prevents some of us from openly confronting someone who is clearly enjoying subjecting others to noxtious odors?
I'd pay money to be a fly on the wall by the water cooler today.