Its not easy playing God

    It was last night, Everything seemed to be normal. I was unaware of the epic emotional roller coaster I was about to embark on. I had just gotten off work and decided to smoke some highly potent greenery. Not that I'm a stoner or anything I just like to smoke sometimes to relax. I was scrolling through my friendslist on facebook judging the women based on if I would have sex with them or not when I realized I had cotton mouth that was almost on a life threatening scale. When I walked into the kitchen to make a drink I noticed that there was an ENTIRE colony of ants. Thousands making their way from the back door to the sink. I made tacos the night before and didnt do the dishes yet now the joke is on me. Due to the elevation of my mind body and spirit because of this super weed that I thought I could handle the situation got interesting. I looked around and found a can of raid under the sink. Sidenote- WTF do they put in raid? If roaches can survive a nuclear fallout then WTF do they put in raid? As soon as I sprayed the ants  they started freaking the fuck out. This isnt an easy way to go. they violently thrash and have seizures before they die. So there is a massacre taking place in my kitchen. thousands of dead ants. when I noticed a single ant out of the corner of my eye a about a foot away from the vast majority that were dead and he was struggling across the floor. "DONT YOU FUCKING DIE ON ME" I yelled. You can make it bro! so I got on my hands and knees and started following him. Did you think I was going to kill him? Hell no can you imagine the story he is going to tell when he makes it back home? Bitch seriously, "FUCK DUDE EVERYONES DEAD MAN. HE KILLED THEM ALL, JOE, MARK, LISA, MY COUSIN BOBBY THEY'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD MAN". But he lived. Every other asshole ant in my kitchen died except him. Was there a purpose for this? I didnt know but followed him for a good 20 mintutes across the living room I think being stoned had something to do with it, Because I'm not even a weird person. He had to go through my living room because the back door entry was covered in a pool of raid and dead friends and family of his. flooded with them in fact. I eventually got bored and went back to my room after I FINALLY made a drink but I wonder if that ant ever made it. I mean he just went through some mentally fucked up shit. But he had the will to live, and his journey had just begun. I like to think he got back home. And with his new appreciation for life and struggle he will have a positive influence on his colony. Its not easy playing God...
Uploaded 10/13/2011
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