I've never been a quitter. Once I set my mind on something, I'll go to lengths most people wouldn't even consider to get it. For one of the few times in my life, I'm quitting on something that I've held near and dear for a long time. Smoking.
I used to smoke a pack to a pack and a half a day. I haven't had a cigarette in 30 days. This has been the hardest fucking thing I've ever done in my life, hands down. The first week I felt physically ill at times. I would rip someone a new asshole for looking at me the wrong way. Everyone close to me stayed away from me, to give me space, and probably because they were a little afraid.
The funny thing is, I'm starting to feel fucking fantastic. I was always physically active and I thought I was in decent condition. I was wrong. My stamina is improving, my energy level is off the charts, and I sleep a lot less. I can't wait to see where I'm at after six months.
Why did I quit? It wasn't because people told me to. When someone would tell me that smoking is bad for me, I'd tell them to go fuck themselves and mind their own business. The one thing that got to me was seeing my three year old son take the straw out of his drinking box and start hauling on it like a cigarette. It's one thing to fuck up my own shit, but I didn't want to influence my child to do the same.
Regardless, I just need to say that I have delved in various addictive substances in my time, but none were as hard to shake as smoking cigarettes. Judging by the withdrawal, I think it's safe to say smoking is the devil. At this point, I'm going to go ahead and say that I'm not going to have another cigarette again...until I retire (I guess I'm not a total quitter after all).
When my kids are grown and set up, and I retire, I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want. You're supposed to enjoy your golden years, aren't you? That time is many years away though. Until then, I guess I'm going to have to get used to walking around with pink lungs and porn star stamina.
Have a good day bishes.