Spiced Rum

its been a while since i got drunk on spiced rum, it was my first drink ever. 

back when i didnt drink or smoke alone, because i had decided that only losers do that (i was right), all i ever wanted to do was live, live free, live fast, live hard and make everyday the most bad ass thing that had ever happened on the fucking planet. as far as i can tell thats exactly what i did. want me to regale you with tales of my earlier days? too fuckin bad. thats not what im doing tonight.

but since were on the subject...

as a 6th grader, 11 yrs old, i was very interested in electronics and everything technological. i had a portable CB radio, a learners chemistry set, casio watch with electo-luminescent backlight (the blue one, not that faggoty ass green one), you name it. one thing i always longed for and would always catch my eye at the pawn shop was a hand held TV. i mean, seriously? i fuckin TV i can take with me, and watch where ever i go, and change channels, and use headphones..? i need this thing. my friend Wallace has one, and hes 9!

you know that kind of rain that never really picks up but still lasts all day? it was a day like that. after school i had at least 3 hours of mom free time and i abused the shit out of it. i got out of school before Ace and i liked to play in the creek. by the time he came around i was already acquainted with the temperature and speed of the water flowing under the roads through concrete tubes. i should have been an underwater welder.

it must have been... march? either way, i cant imagine letting my 11 yr old do what i did. but then again, it made me a tough mother fucker, literally. the water was cold and fast. Ace and i were shirtless, playing in the creeks, throwing rocks, taunting traffic, jumping over the water with distances of at least 15 ft! god damn we were cool. being that the water was only a few feet deep the only thing we hadnt done was full fledged swim, and for that matter, submerge ourselves. the bets began at 3 seconds. easy. 5 seconds. damn its cold and im out of breath. 7 seconds, thats rough, why? what makes this task so difficult? Ace says "if you hold your breath for 8 seconds under water, ill give you my portable TV." i barely had to think about it. we clarified the winnings. it wasnt the color Sony 2.3 inch TV with  batteries included, no. it was the 5 inch black and white TV with radio bands and a sweet ass carrying handle, headphone jack and a single speaker that could run on ac power OR 6 D cell batteries. deal. i prep myself. the water looks like thinned out chocolate milk and feels like glass slipping past my legs.

deep breath, ive got this. down into the waist deep water.

one, no prob.
two, im gonna watch so much animaniacs!!
three, and family matters!! he is so dumb!!
four, damn this water, almost out
five, lungs hurting! its only been 5 seconds though! using my casio watch ive timed myself before, i can hold my breath for 125 seconds! it must be the temp..
six, hold on, hold on, hold on
seven, it suddenly hit me... i dont have any D cell batteries!
eight, for the TV i just won!!! 

i explode from the water gasping for a breath of chilled air, the look on his face after losing such a sweet item was not what i had been hoping for. hmm
i leapt from the waters and headed to the apartment of my cohort. the warming glow of the black and white screen against my bedroom walls and summertime fort made of sheets, chairs and a broom (for height in the center) was all i could imagine. 
being a kid was so easy, what the hell happened to me?
Uploaded 11/19/2011
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