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Staring endlessly all night

Tomorrow my nephews' have a doctor's appointment. Our family thinks that they both have muscular dystrophy. I'm pretty sure that's what it is, too. The doctor will be discussing the blood test tomorrow and then they're going to go through some other tests to see exactly what they have is. A bit scary and it's stressing me out a lot more than it should. I don't really know why I'm reacting the way I am. If they have it, then my parents are going to find another house and I'm sure my sister will be too. Some place where they have wheelchair access.

I'm finally going back to school this Fall. Work has really held me back from finishing up. I try my hardest to be on my store manager's good side by coming in on all shifts and being on my "best behavior." So asking for days off during the week for school seems impossible anymore. I hate online classes, but I might end up doing that. I can't lose my job. It's a fucking stupid place to work, but yet I need it. Once I'm done, though, I think I might leave for a few years to a university. Who knows where exactly. If my nephews' have something that serious, then I would want to stick around. But, I need to get away. It seems like there's always something holding me back from doing what I SHOULD be doing. Almost have my associate's....16 credits left. Hell, I should just go to school for the rest of my life...or not.

I took a Benedryl and it's starting to really kick my ass. This stupid weather keeps messing with me.

So I had the coolest dream a few nights ago. I somehow went back in time. I think it was in the 50s and I was still in my town. Everything looked so different. I had $40 on me and being then, it was a lot more money. I was driving my parent's car....which was impossible then. I also had my cell phone. There was some taco fast food place. I was really hungry and I was going to buy everything on the menu. I called my parents and told them that I was there and I'd get them whatever they wanted.

I woke up starving.

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