TIME FOR PIE

My dear friends, enemies, moderators, and Pepper Peanut (not sure what his role is),

It is with heavy heart that I must inform you of your impending doom. You see the responsibility of improving the Earth in my district has fallen upon my shoulders. This duty is not my desire, but my fate, my raison d'etre, if you will?

Mankind has stagnated and under the current conditions can no longer evolve in the way he was meant to. As witnessed here in recent history the collective intelligence of your kind is simply unacceptable. You see, the gene pool has stagnated and suffered the dilution of overpopulation.

Man was meant to reach for the stars and beyond and yet NASA has cancelled it's projects. Why is this? It is because the USA has been over run with bread gobblers, who add nothing to the contextual make up of the human race. They must be eradicated.

When early man traveled out of Africa and headed North, the challenges they faced required them to solve complex problems that necessitated an evolution of his very being. That evolution has now slowed down to a trickle with only a few of us Uberhumans being born unto this planet in recent history. We Uber people must now destroy you lesser people as to improve the human race. Do not take it personally, your existence has unfortunately been the result of mistakes or an out of control desire to fornicate. 

I've tried to convince my elders that mass vaccinations to cause early death was the humane thing to do, but unfortunately due to the efforts of people like Alex Jones this simply is not fast enough. My superiors have already set your extermination into motion by removing most of your intelligence through poor diet, bad music and caustic idols. We, the Ubermen, have also set the table to cause another great war. These efforts, while effective, do not meet our timetable.

Therefore, if you can forgive us, we will need to speed things up just a wee bit. I ask you all to kindly accept the plethora of neutron bombs that will be unleashed into your societies. It is after all for the betterment of mankind.

Thank you all, your friendly,
Lesser Being Exterminator,
Uberman Letemdangle
5th District, Americatus.