The Led Zeppelin Mystery
Letemdangle
Published
03/25/2011
This happened just the other day. My extravagantly wealthy friends and I were getting bored of racing formula one cars and such, so we decided to give Jimmy Page a visit. He was driving us nuts trying to get us to go visit him at his Scottish castle to listen to some of his latest riffs. We figured it would be a good distraction from our extravagant lifestyles and get him off our backs at the same time.
As luck would have it the whole band was there when we dropped in. Even John Bonham was there. He laughed as he said, "reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated". How cliche! The accommodations were quite nice considering it was an eight hundred year old castle. There were even ghosts. The ghosts of Jimi Hendrex and Buddy Holly were constantly bickering in the corridors. Bobby, that's what we call Robert Plant, complained about what a poor investment it was buying their ghosts off of E-bay. After all they were dead.
The private concert was, OK, I guess. Lady Gaga was awakening from her crypt and was quite anxious to show us some of her new ideas. We were already bored with all the new Zeppelin tunes and told her to fuck off.
The next morning was quite the eye opener as I awoke with a huge headache slumped over the wheel of a solid gold Rolls Royce. What the fuck? Some weird Asian dude said, "I work for Neko", was trying to give me a blow job.
Disoriented but quite satisfied, I made my way back to the castle. Now if you know Jimmy like I do, he is quite generous and loves me dearly. It is quit annoying at times, but it has it's advantages. This time, the electronic interface of CCTV cameras, which are programmed to recognized me, lowered the moat. James Levine and the Boston Symphony performed Brahms's Symphony No. 4
as I walked across the moat. What a treat.
As I entered the court yard I could see all my extremely beautiful, rich and popular friends anxiously waiting to greet me. They all raised their right hands and gave me the "gun and the wink." The courtyard echoed with guffaws! Damn I'm good!
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For those who are not aware of James Levine. He does not sit on that stool because he is a rather substantial fellow. No, it is because if you watch carefully he uses his feet to orchestrate the violin section. Pure genius.
As luck would have it the whole band was there when we dropped in. Even John Bonham was there. He laughed as he said, "reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated". How cliche! The accommodations were quite nice considering it was an eight hundred year old castle. There were even ghosts. The ghosts of Jimi Hendrex and Buddy Holly were constantly bickering in the corridors. Bobby, that's what we call Robert Plant, complained about what a poor investment it was buying their ghosts off of E-bay. After all they were dead.
The private concert was, OK, I guess. Lady Gaga was awakening from her crypt and was quite anxious to show us some of her new ideas. We were already bored with all the new Zeppelin tunes and told her to fuck off.
The next morning was quite the eye opener as I awoke with a huge headache slumped over the wheel of a solid gold Rolls Royce. What the fuck? Some weird Asian dude said, "I work for Neko", was trying to give me a blow job.
Disoriented but quite satisfied, I made my way back to the castle. Now if you know Jimmy like I do, he is quite generous and loves me dearly. It is quit annoying at times, but it has it's advantages. This time, the electronic interface of CCTV cameras, which are programmed to recognized me, lowered the moat. James Levine and the Boston Symphony performed Brahms's Symphony No. 4
as I walked across the moat. What a treat.
As I entered the court yard I could see all my extremely beautiful, rich and popular friends anxiously waiting to greet me. They all raised their right hands and gave me the "gun and the wink." The courtyard echoed with guffaws! Damn I'm good!
____________________________________________________________________________________________
For those who are not aware of James Levine. He does not sit on that stool because he is a rather substantial fellow. No, it is because if you watch carefully he uses his feet to orchestrate the violin section. Pure genius.
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