A man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He saw a parrot in a cage and started saying things, try to make the parrot imitate him, but it wasn't working.
"That's a stupid parrot you got there," he said to the bartender.
"That's not a parrot," said the bartender. "It's a shredder bird. What you do is say 'shredder bird' and the object that you want it to shred." He pulls out a newspaper. "Shredder bird, the newspaper."
The bird viciously attacks the newspaper and within seconds, the newspaper is nothing but confetti.
The man is impressed. He takes off his hat. "Shredder bird, my hat!"
The bird attacks the hat with the same result. This draws a big crowd. A few minutes later, a giant thug starts pushing his way through the crowd. "GIVE ME A DRINK!" he yells. When he makes his way to the front and sees the bird, he says "What a stupid parrot," he says to the bartender.
"It's not a parrot," the bartender says. "It's a shredder bird."

"Hahahahaha!" the thug laughs. "Shredder bird my ass!"