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The Complete 'Noob' Field Guide

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Hey, My names Eastside_Dave and you might remember me from such blogs as, 'How to cook crack' or 'How to become a Mack Daddy'.

I've noticed a stress in the blog section and also through other parts of our fabulous site. This may be caused by a major influx and flow of 'noobs'. 'Noobs' come in many life forms and can destroy anything that took time to build. They are oblivious to 'site rankings' and 'e-respect' as they show with unintelligent and last minute retarded comments.

Never try to take on a noob alone! Always have some type of back-up just incase the 'noob' makes a witty comment that you cannot top. (For this just proves that you should just leave and give him you're password).

After a 'noob' has been on the site without going through what is called 'mental breakdown', he or she is slowly accepted into the pack. This rarely happens but when captured on screen it is the most beautiful moment know to 'man'.

Identification- The 'noob' usually wears the same clothes at it was born with. Plain Brown hair and a dingy lime green pull-over sweatshirt. They typically use sayings as but not limited to - "OMG, LOL, WTF, LMAO, LMFAO, ROFLMAO, or phrases like, -"This just wasted 1:15 of my time", unknowingly knowing they are on the internet on a site to waste time.

 

Final Words: I hope this guide helps you out in the field, so take caution when trolling eBaumsworld.com and good hunting.

Eastside_Dave Uploaded 01/15/2009
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