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Eulogy

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have you ever noticed how when someone dies everyone has something nice to say about them no matter who they were? Michael Jackson scared my son when he was 4. true story. my kid walked past the tv and a picture of "The King of Poop" poped up. my son screamed and ran ans yelled "monster! monster!" all the way to his room where he hid under his bed. me and the wife laughed and laughed. for months we threatened him with the "Michael Jackson Monster" when he wouldnt eat his veggies or clean his room.

bottom line is the dude paid a kids parents a dump truck lload of money to drop child molestation charges. an innocent man doesnt do that. parents that are worth a shit dont accept either, but the cash never exchanges hands if he's innocent. and now all i hear about is how great he was. fuckin dude didnt make a good record(in my opinion, mind you) after Thriller. he carved his face up like a jack-o-lantern, hung his kid over a balcony, named afore mentioned kid BLANKET, and wanted to be Peter Pan. sounds like a great guy. if he couldnt sing he would have been committed decades ago.

David Carradine, a name now sononimous with autoeroticaxphixiation. what a way to go, huh? now my imagination paints this picture for me: Thai police open a closet to see Mr.Carradine hanging, naked, face purple and bloated. a small rope lays limp in his dead fingers. the other end tied tightly around the head of his cock witch now dangles between slightly bent old man legs covered in shit. eyes bulging and tongue lolling from his mouth, Mr.Carradine has now sealed his rememberance for eternity. all for a nut.

Ed McMahon...........fuck him. you were Johnny Carsons bitch then you were the host of Star Search, and finally the Publishers Clearing House spokesman. no real tallent just........there. oh! and irony of all ironys! you were the spokesman for an organization that gives money away AND YOU WERE FLAT FUCKING BROKE!!LOL oh shit now that's funny!

now, in her heyday, i woulda fucked ol' Farrah. Barbarella was pretty hot. too bad the bitch had to take a dirt nap before she could get enough plastic surgery to make a comeback. oh well.

there is my eulogy for some of the people who died.

 

 

R.I.P motherfuckers

AWFULJACKASS Uploaded 06/25/2009
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