Greatest Blog on the Face of the Earth
I thought I was in a pretty decent mood today. Then I went and listened to a speaker this evening. Holy Christ! Now I am pissed off. The sad thing is, it has nothing to do with the speaker. It's me. However, that doesn't change the fact that I wanted to do one of two things. One, eat a gun. Or two, jump out of my seat and throttle this lady. Oh yeah, it was a woman speaker. The rage blinded that little tidbit.
This woman's overtly positive attitude infuriated me beyond description. I don't know why. I am in a fairly peaceful little, dark corner of life right now. This lady's message of experience, strength, and hope made me cringe with an unheralded level of resentment. Again, not her problem...I know. I wish I could put my finger on why her message made me want to send rattlesnakes down her throat. I shouldn't have felt this way. I know this lady. I know her husband. She is a fine messenger. Tonight was not the night for me to hear her message. I think it was her use of the phrase "...greatest on the face of the Earth...." She used this at least four times, when referring to her sister, mother, where she grew up, her husband, etc. I could feel the vomit rising. Everyone else at the meeting loved her message. I guess I have work to do...
I have composed a list of things I would have rather done tonight instead:
1) Watch Titanic
2) Masturbate to Titanic
3) Watch Rosie O'Donnell do her "comedy" naked.
4) Masturbate to Rosie O'Donnell do her "comedy" naked.
5) Read a blog by Lord Infamous
6) Read a blog by White_Chocolate (oh wait I covered that)
7) Handle snakes at Church
8) See another local news telecast about the eff'ing Colts
9) Shove hot, rusty nails into my freshly shorn sac
10) Help Bill O'Reilly move
Moral of the story, a bad meeting can ruin a good day. However, I'd rather this happen than no meeting ruin my life. If you read this and feel like you have been cheated out of 2 minutes of your life, please comment with ISMNFT? If you know me and want to give me a smile, please comment with ISMNFT?