I'm a guy and my brain just works differently from girls in general and my GF in particular. A simple example is when we went to COSTCO a few months back. My tax return had just been deposited (I pulled in five figures in 2009. Not bragging; just sayin'...) and it was time to stock up on shit. We needed Kleenex so I thought I'd buy a bundle. We have a spare room that I think might accommodate the shed-sized gross of Kleenex so I grab the first one on the pallet. "Is there one with a better pattern on the box?" GF asks. Really? REALLY?? If I wanted to waste your time would go into the pragmatic reasons why the fucking graphics adorning the side of a snot-wipe box don't matter even half as much as the results of the North Dakota Cup Stacking Champoinship but if you are a guy you are saying, "EXACTLY," and if you are a chick you are asking, "Why WOULDN'T you want a pretty pattern?" The other difference I've noticed between men and women is that women will ALWAYS ask how much a baby weighed at birth: Me: "My cousin, Baily had her baby boy today." GF: "How big was he?" Me: "Oh, I didn't think to ask." When the roles are reversed, it plays something like this: GF: "My cousin, Baily had her baby boy today." Me: "So are they sure Justin's the father?" PS...Next time you beat off, make sure to admire the Kleenex box as you wipe the Spoodge and spit...