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A Hooker Blog

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If you love something, set it free, unless it's a hooker in your trunk. In that case, you might want to be a little more discrete. You'd probably have to kill her or something but you'd probably get caught unless you thought of everything...

Cops do all this forensic shit nowdays, like fiber analysis and DNA.

Yeah, they take, like, your pubes from the chick's thigh and sequence your DNA so you should probably go to a nasty public restroom first and gather as many stray pubes as you can and spread them out on the ho's body.

Hell, you could even go to a video booth peep show and sop up some of the yuk-puddle from the floor and leave random sperm cells all around the body but if a CSI guy uses a scanning electronic microscope, he can see if those polywogs have been dead for a couple days so you'd want to make sure it was one of the cleaner video peep shows so there is no decaying bro-flow aging on the floor for more than an hour or two. Tip: Organic matter breaks down faster in warmer, wetter areas so pay attention to ambient heat and humidity.

Problem solved, pesky puss peddler will not bother you any more. Sleep at ease that night.

If she does show up again, like chicks do, bitching that you didn't cuddle or that she left her earrings in your car or that she needs her money or her pimp will punch her in the tits, be afraid because she's a zombie and will fuck your shit up.

If you love something set it free; If it comes back... SHOOT IT IN THE HEAD FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!

ugdork Uploaded 06/12/2010
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