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Halloween Crap to Make Your Halloween More Craptacular

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It's almost that time of year. We dress ourselves up in various costumes, get extremely drunk, and end up having to apologize to a lot of people the next day. Here we have some suggestions of crap you can buy to make your Halloween even more enjoyable. 

 
PreToxx 
The hangover cure! Finally you can enjoy this night of abusing your liver and still wake up feeling fresh and energized the next day. Now that's what I call protection. It’s like wearing a condom for your hangover.
 
 
Skeleton Flamingos
Because trailer parks celebrate Halloween too.
 
 
Burqa
Not just for Muslims, but butterfaces too!
 
Masters of Horror Season 1 Box Set:
If you don't plan on going out for Halloween then why not get a bunch of great scary movies and watch them all. You'll thank me for this after being unable to sleep for weeks due to all the nightmares. 
 
 
Blood Bath Shower Curtain
  • Scare trick or treaters by inviting them into your shower, then when they get a load of these shower curtains they’ll be even more scared.
 
 
Leather Bondage Mask
The safe word is, "trick or treat"
 
 
 
Apples
 
which happen to pair well with...
 
Razor Blades
  
Halloween Beer Bottle Labels
Labels you can slap onto your beer bottles. These are so gosh darn awesome, women will flock to you and ask you if it's for sale at Crate & Barrel. 
 
Rob Zombie's "Mondo Sex Head"
In case of a Rob Zombie Apocalypse?
 
 
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