I've noticed a lot of people have a strange opinion on alcohol in general, apparently built on stereotypes. I'm a connaisseur (however you spell that shit) of refined alcoholic beverages and I'm shocked when someone who claims they don't drink because alcohol is bad says they are doing it because they don't want to become alcoholics.

This idiotic statement is false, of course, as only the cheap alcoholic beverages (beer, red wine) are addictive.

Okay, so the patrician drinkers (as opposed to the plebe class of cheap drunks) prolly smirk right now because they know what I mean. There are people who get drunk on light beer or cheap wine, or even malt liquor. The terrible thing about these people is not that they are most often slobs (okay, partially it is), but the bad opinion they give to refined drinkers like me and other people from the upper class that like imported stuff, for example.

How can you tell if you're a refined drinker? It's simple. You like more expensive stuff that has a nice taste and a fan of imported alcohols.