Some people seem like they're addicted self  pity. I know it seems like I bring up that my wife died years ago often. I don't know why that seems to happen here. I've moved on and I don't feel anything about it anymore. There was a few lessons I learned about it that I could pass on.

1) You're not going to stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on until you decide to do so. That's the number one thing to remember. The longer you hold onto the pain the more ingrained the habit of self-pity becomes.

2) Set aside time to deal with it. When Jackie died all I could do was clean and keep moving. Whenever I tried to think about it I just ended up having a million half thoughts. So, in order to just get it all out, I let my son stay with his grandparents a couple of weekends while I sat at home, drank a beer, listened to some sad music, and cried and faced the facts. Avoidance doesn't resolve anything. It's just like worry, just under the surface draining your energy.

3) After the first two things are done thorougly you can being making a logical plan for how to go forward.

As a side note for Lady, I'm not saying some of the comments I've made were right. But just what do you expect from trolls? This isn't a sensitivity awareness website. You've come to a place where people are notorious for being able to laugh at their own shortcomings and generally not take things too seriously.

Anyway, I hope this blog helps you. If you're going to keep trying, there's a good chance  you might keep getting the same results. You're going to have to develop a thick skin.