When you have a
'I Hate My
Job'
day,
[even if retired
you have those sometimes]
try
this: 

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer
section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson &
Johnson.
Be very sure you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed.

Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer. Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.

Now the fun part begins .

Take out the literature from the box and read it carefully . You will notice that in small print there is a statement: 

'Every Rectal Thermometer made by
Johnson & Johnson is personally  tested 
and then
sanitized.  ' 
Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times,'I am so glad I do not work in the thermometer quality control department at Johnson & Johnson.'