ONLY IN AMERICA...

... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

... do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet
coke.

... do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the
counters.

... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and
leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage.

... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call
waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
talk to in the first place.

... do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of
eight

... do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well:
"Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking
creatures."