I work with a Polish guy. He always seems to be extremely lucky, as if everything he touches to turns to gold. He has the cutest girlfriends, has a great physique, drives a Ferrari and leads our team every month in sales.

I have another friend at work who is Swedish. He isn't very lucky. He is usually the last in sales, drives a Daewoo and has a fat girlfriend. My Swedish friend asked my Polish friend what his secret is, to which my Polish friend replied, "I wasn't always Polish. I used to be Swedish just like you. I had a surgery a few years ago to remove 1/2 my brain to make me Polish. Now everything I do works out very well for me."

The next day, my Swedish friend went to have this surgery to remove half of his brain in order to be lucky. After the surgery, the doctor came into the recovery room and said, "I'm sorry. We accidentally removed 9/10 of your brain. Unfortunately, you are not Polish."

My friend jumped out of his bed and screamed, "MAMA MIA!"