Dear School Nurse:
SHNICKERDOODLE Bouncy will not be attending school today. He/she has come down with a case of Herpes and has horrible messes and a/an Retarded fever. We have made an appointment with the On fire Dr. POLYWAGON, who studied for many years in Heaven and has 38472 degrees in pediatrics. He will send you all the information you need. Thank you!
Sincerely
Mrs. Sucky.