Officer, this is how the fight started...

I rear-ended the car in front of me. I admit that. It was my fault.

So, we both pull over to the side of the road, and slowly the driver of the car I hit gets out of his car. . . and you know how you just get so stressed...and life...sometimes, life seems like...um, suddenly funny?

Well, the driver of the car I hit is a DWARF! He gets out of his car and I get out of my car.

He is frowning and scowling and he storms over to me. Right up close at me he looks up in my face and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"

And I don't know what possessed me, officer, but I look down at him and I said, "Well, if you're not Happy -- which one are you?"

.....and that's when the fight started.