Forget illegible handwriting! Have you ever witnessed the results of what happens when doctors pay little attention to spelling, grammar and interpretation?

Here is a list of medical notes written by doctors about certain patients.

1. The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut, and handed to the paediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately.

2. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

3. She has no rigours or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

4. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

5. The patient was examined, X-rated and sent home.

6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

8. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

9. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

10. The patient refused autopsy.

11. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

12. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

13. She is numb from her toes down.

14. The skin was moist and dry.

15. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.