In a bid to get more budget money from the government, the CIA, the FBI and the LAPD wanted to hold a massive competition to decide who deserved the money the most.

After the three branches gathered their elite officers and agents, they met at a gigantic dense forest. The rules of the competition were that the first team to find the only white rabbit in the forest in the shortest length of time wins the money.

The FBI team went first, and they stormed the forest. They used chemical testing to find droppings from a white rabbit but could only find a brown rabbit. They dyed the brown rabbit white, and tried to pass him off as the real thing until it started to rain and the white dye washed away, disqualitfying the FBI team.

The CIA team went next, and used an array of top secret satellites to locate the elusive rabbit's tracks-- but their attempts were fruitless. To avoid embarrassment for not finding the white rabbit, they set the forest on fire and released a press conference declaring the forest fires were inhibiting efforts to find the rabbit, and got disqualified.

Finally, the LAPD elite squad rushed into the forest, and five minutes later, everyone could hear loud crashing noises and a bunch of screaming. Everyone was afraid to enter the forest, but soon after, the LAPD rolled out of the forest beating the living crap out of a large grizzily bear with their police batons and the bear was screaming "OK! OK! OK! I'm a white rabbit!"