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Florida's Dumb and Crazy laws

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Florida
(SARASOTA) It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
Apparently with an exaggerated idea of the laws of thermal dynamics, the city council of West Palm Beach, Fla., once decreed that the roofs of all outhouses be fireproof.
A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
Big Pine Key: It is illegal to molest a Key deer; If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail.
Cape Coral: It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline; It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street (This law is limited to only those who do not own the house)
Daytona Beach: The molestation of trash cans is banned; While intoxicated, being under influence of narcotics is prohibited; It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired;
Don't plan on using any of the celebratory Champagne bottle sizes known as Methuselahs, Salamanazars, Balthazars or Nebuchadnezzars. These very traditional Champagne bottle sizes are all illegal in Florida.
Florida deals with its prostitution problem by giving prostitutes spending money, a five-year banishment, and a bus ticket out of town.
Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.
Florida prohibits topless walking or running within a 150 foot zone between the beach and the street.
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
Hialeah: Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
In Florida failure to tell your neighbor his house is on fire is illegal.
In Florida it is illegal to fish while driving across a bridge.
In Florida, a special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
In Florida, men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays may be jailed.
In Miami, Florida it is illegal for a man to wear any kind of strapless gown.
In Miami, it is forbidden to imitate an animal.
In Miami, it's illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Miami Shores Village, Fla., has for years required that all goods made in Communist countries and offered for sale in Miami Shores Village be clearly marked as such. The ordinance notes that such goods are often marked in a "false, misleading or inadequate manner, to hide their Communist origins."
In Sarasota it is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
In Saratoga, Florida it is illegal to sing while wearing a bathing suit.
It is considered an offense to shower naked.
It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.
It is illegal to fart in a public place after 6:00pm on a Thursday.
It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
It's against a Key West, Fla., ordinance to spit on a church floor.
It's illegal in Florida for an unmarried man and woman to live together in "open and gross lewdness." Connecticut once had a similar law, but only the woman was penalized.
Key West: Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
Miami: It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown; No person shall operate a bicycle unless it is equipped with a bell or device capable of giving a signal audible for a distance of at least 100 feet, but no bicycle shall be equipped with, nor shall any person use upon a bicycle, any siren or whistle.
Oral sex is illegal.
Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
Pensacola: Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person; It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel; A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.
Pinecrest: In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained.
Sanford Stage: Nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.
Sarasota: If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00; You may not catch crabs.
Tampa Bay: It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.
Under a 1959 ordinance, stubborn children were considered vagrants in Jupiter Inlet Colony, Fla.
When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
Women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer. The salon owner can also be fined for this horrible crime.
Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
dj_em Uploaded 01/01/2010
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