Steve was a middle-aged man who had decided to return to college to pursue a degree. Not certain of what degree he wanted to take, he began to look around campus at all the different colleges. He saw the college of physics, the college of sociology, the college of psychology and the college of assuming. Having never heard of a college of assuming, Steve was puzzled.

While he stood there pondering what it was, the Dean of the college happened by and inquired if he could help. Steve replied, "I've never heard of the college of assuming. What is it?"

"Well, I'm the Dean of the college. Here in the college of assuming, we take assumption to a new art form," said the Dean.

"I still don't understand," replied Steve.

"Let's try this. Can I assume you have a dog?" asked the Dean.

"Why, yes, I do have a dog," replied Steve.

"And can I assume that you have a backyard for your dog to play in?" inquired the Dean.

"Why, yes, I do have a backyard for my dog," said Steve.

"Okay, and I can I further assume that because you have a backyard you also have a house?" said the Dean.

"Why, yes, I do have a house," said Steve, beginning to be amazed.

"Now, because you have a house and a dog, and a backyard, can I then assume that you have a wife?" said the Dean flatly.

"That's amazing! Yes, I do have a wife," said Steve.

"And can I assume that because you have a wife, you also have children?" said the Dean.

"Wow! Yes, I do have children." replied Steve.

"Then because you have a wife and children, can I assume you are not gay?" inquired the Dean.

"No, I'm not gay," replied Steve.

"There you see," stated the Dean. "From the simple fact of assuming you had a dog, I was able to find out that you had a house with a backyard, a wife and kids, and that you are not gay."

Clearly amazed, Steve enrolled in the class assumption. One day about three weeks later, while waiting for class to start, Steve saw a very puzzled man in the halls. "Can I help you?" inquired Steve.

"Why, yes," replied the man. "What is the college of assuming?"

Delighted, Steve replied, "The college of assuming takes assumption to a new art form."

"I'm not sure I understand," replied the man.

"Well, let me give you an example," said Steve. "Do you own a dog?"

"Well, no," replied the man.

Steve quickly stepped back and said, "You fag!"