You might be a redneck if...


You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture.


A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.


An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.


You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother's tooth.


You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.


Your secret family recipe is illegal.


Your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.


Your baby's favorite teething ring is the garden hose in the front yard.


Your coat-of-arms features kudzu.


Your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.


You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.


Your best ashtray is a tu