He has "terrible regret" over meeting with El Chapo. Sure, he is responsible for tens of thousands of murders, but go ahead, Sean, eat tacos and drink tequila with him.

Penn has been accused of beating Madonna and violently assaulting photographers. He was sentenced to 60 days in prison for punching an extra in the face in 1987. He's cooled off as of late — most likely due to his Jeet Kune Do regimen.

He studies Jeet Kune Do. I don't know what that is, but it sounds super spiritual and pompous.

He's touts his progressivism on the daily, but raised a son who recently called a photographer a bleeping N-word and a bleeping F-word (and no, not that F-word, either).

He said ex-Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is "one of the most important forces we've had on this planet."

He took this photo for Esquire.

He calls guns "cowardly killing machines," yet... ...here's a picture of him patrolling New Orleans with a shotgun. He also recently melted his 65 guns into a sculpture, encouraged by his new girlfriend named Charlize Theron. Good on you Sean. Now you can talk about guns all you like.

He called Matt and Trey ignorant cross-dressers.

Speaking of cross-dressing... ...here's a picture of Penn in drag.

He called Britain "colonist, archaic and ludicrous" for its Falkland Islands territory three months after colonizing Libya with his ideology. Here's the thing, Sean, you can't hate on countries for being colonialist while you go to other countries and try to force American-style democracy. That's the exact definition of colonialism, dickhead.

He referred to the Academy as "commie, homo-loving sons of guns" after winning Best Actor for "Milk." Says the guy who took the Oscar-guaranteed role. "I did not expect this." Yes, you did.

"I can never get ahead of the game because of the movies I do."

He went full retard. "Never go full retard."

I miss Spicoli. It's a sad thing when people step out of their talents to fuck it all up. Sean, if you're reading this, which I don't think you are since you're probably teaching kids with leprosy in Papua New Guinea about Karl Marx, please, for the love of God, STOP.