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- It could be worse
- There was an old country sheriff who always said, "It could have been worse." No matter what happened, the old sheriff always had the same...
- ussoldier820 03/18/2012
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- Suicide hotline funny
- I just called the suicide hotline AND THEY DON'T THINK RUNNING OUT OF MAPLE SYRUP WHILE I'M EATING PANCAKES IS A REASON TO KILL MYSELF.
- Martin420 03/12/2012
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- lunch
- there were 3 construction workers,all eating lunch.one had a sandwwich another one had chili the other had a taco. the one with the sandwich said...
- Xpunish3r_2rAwX 07/20/2011
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- Why did the chicken . . .
- Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side
- Sambotron 07/05/2011
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- Suicidal guy
- A man was so depressed the other night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, his savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., He called the...
- UNUSERNAME 10/07/2010
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- Fun with canoes
- Not sure if this is a repost, but here goes: Three guys are adventuring out in the jungle together when they're set upon by a tribe of cannibals. ...
- DoomCock 09/07/2010
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- Seattle
- In Seattle, they have a saying: 'If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes and then shoot yourself in the face.
- rattlebox02 09/05/2010
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- theromans
- So there's this guy named "theromans" who likes to post jokes. He thinks they are funny, but no one else does. This dude is the same type...
- jmartpigfcker 07/31/2010
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- Nate Kaeding's Suicide attempt.
- It was reported today that Nate Kaeding, kicker for the Sand Diego Chargers, tried to commit suicide by hanging. Kaeding attempted to kick the chair...
- DarthTolkien 01/23/2010
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- Priest and thugs
- It was Sunday and a priest was preaching to a congregation. However, he was constantly distracted by profanity going on outside the church. The...
- rockzilla411 09/24/2009
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- What the perfect gf would do if shes pregnant
- Bruce is driving over the Sydney Harbor Bridge one day when he sees his girlfriend, Sheila about to throw herself off. Bruce slams on the brakes and...
- rockzilla411 06/07/2009
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- Bob the Blonde and The Suicide Jumper
- Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10 pm news...
- abbottwar 04/10/2009
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- Stranded Sailors
- A ship with 30 sailors and one woman sinks just off shore of a deserted island. After being stranded for one month, the woman says “I can not...
- xckxgoaleprcaun 03/20/2009
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- Darwin Awards 2008 Awards for stupidity
- 2008 Darwin Awards Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here...
- xckxgoaleprcaun 02/26/2009
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- How does a Russian commit suicide?
- How does a Russian commit suicide? He smells his armpit How does an American commit suicide? He tells this joke to a Russian.
- ghettosmoke 01/02/2009
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- A really bad day
- There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps...
- al033 01/01/2009
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- Suicide Bomber
- A suicide bomber walks into a bar and... BOOM
- illogiksunltd 12/08/2008
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- A Really Bad Day
- There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps...
- buckeyesr1 11/24/2008
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- 478
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- suicide jokes
- A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says; 'Sod off, you won't bring it back.' ...... A suicide bomber runs into...
- Frankielike 10/24/2008
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- The Suicide Joke
- If your friends wants to commit suicide say this: Hey if you DO commit suicide When I die Im gonna hunt you down in heaven Im gonna make u wish...
- mathewwins 10/24/2008
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- Suicide Hotline
- I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline. Got a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked...
- djohn23 10/17/2008
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- A call to a suicide prevention line.
- I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if...
- DarthTolkien 10/01/2008
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- Kurt Cobain interviews
- Why won't the members of Nirvana let Kurt do anymore interviews? He kept shooting his mouth off.
- mynameisnobody 08/26/2008
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- 600
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- Mental Hospital
- After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital...
- i_know_jack 07/30/2008
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- Dont Cry!!
- There's this guy on a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half-an-hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to...
- lilsexfreak95 07/08/2008
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- 413
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- Blonde Suicide
- A blonde and a brunette are living together. The brunette came home from work one day and the blonde had a rope around her waist. The brunette asked...
- damasta79 06/20/2008
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- AWSOME KNOCK KNOCK JOKE!!
- knock knock whos their . . . step..step..step..creek....BAM(suicide because know one was at the door!!)
- diablo345 06/17/2008
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- Blonde Suicide
- I remember back in 1995 i went over to my neighbors house. She was a blonde and for some reason she was mad at the world. She was in the bathroom and...
- ghoul_69 06/13/2008
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- Mental hospital Hero
- After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital...
- liborhurt 06/08/2008
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- Hellen Keller
- Do you know why Helen Keller's dog killed itself? Because it was getting tired of being called, "EEERRRGGHH!!!!"
- waverlygirl 05/22/2008
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- suicidal 93 year old woman
- A 93-year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband, decided that she would just kill herself and join him in...
- ghoul_69 05/15/2008
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- 509
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- 6 O'clock News
- A blonde and a redhead are watching the 6 o'clock news one evening. The redhead bets the blonde $50 that the man in the lead story, who is...
- ghoul_69 04/17/2008
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- 990
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- Suicide
- A man walks into the library and asks the attendant at the front desk for a book on suicide "Fuck off!" She yelled. "You won't bring...
- Dunning12233 03/27/2008
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- 503
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- Suicide Bomber
- i was feeling a little suicidal the other day and decided to phone the suicide hotline , a pakistani man answered the phone i told him i was feeling...
- Derbysquire 03/20/2008
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joke
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- Suicide Bomber
- Why does a person decide to become a suicide bomber ? They figure they can get a blast out of it.
- ChillB10 03/05/2008
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- Bragging mothers
- Two Arab mothers are sitting in the cafe strip chatting over a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping...
- Barraman 02/02/2008
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- 766
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joke
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- Suicide hotline
- I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline. I got a call center in... Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and...
- auminer 01/21/2008
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- 1,198
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- A Really Bad Day
- There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps...
- sk8infreek 01/08/2008
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