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Pinocchio really could have had it all set.

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I'd correct this statement to say she's the "tool much salt" on the chicken.

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This is a classic.

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They better have some extra plumbers on stand by.

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Of course he was significantly shortening it at the time.

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How about we stop using God to argue about things in the real world.

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Wait till they find out Hooters girls laugh at them.

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Soup is great when you're sick.

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If ever there were someone who shouldn't be quoting scripture.

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People having kids in their early 20s are actually the ones without their stuff together.

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He literally sends them to Hell.

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Why is having kids a flex?

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I don't think these dudes have the luxury of being picky.

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That is legitimately creepy.

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It's like a trip down nightmare lane.

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