Misc text - jokes

Retiree

Q: Hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring? A: He opted to stick it out a while longer.

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Ponderisms

Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Strong Man

The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun...

By thelegendery

Featured 17 years ago

Boiling Eggs

Two eggs boiling in a pan, one male and one female. The female egg says "Look, I've got a crack" "No good telling me" replies the male egg "I'm...

By immclovinit

Featured 17 years ago

Good Journalism

A young journalism graduate from Arkansas had gone to work for the New York Times. His first assignment was to write a brief human interest...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Wal-Marts in Iraq

Why doesnt Iraq have any Wal-Marts? Because theres a Target at every corner!

By mortgagemescott

Featured 17 years ago

Stolen Motor Bike

A middle aged guy and his teenage daughter were riding a motor bike and taking a shortcut through a darkened park when they were stopped by a...

By mortgagemescott

Featured 17 years ago

Little Billy

One Wednesday, little Billy went to school. The teacher said, "For the next three days, I will be asking a trivia question, if anyone answers any...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

White House

What do you call someone in the White House who is honest, ethical, intellectual, law abiding, and truthful? A tourist.

By jax813

Featured 17 years ago

Politically Correct Feminine Terminology

She is not: An airhead She is: Reality Impaired She is not: A Bleached Blond She is: Peroxide Dependant She does not have: ...

By B_Easy

Featured 17 years ago

Entering Heaven

A man dies and appears at the Pearly Gates. Have you ever done a good deed? asks St. Peter. Sure, one time I came across a gang of...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Lawyers and Toxic Waste

Q: Why is it that California leads the nation in number of lawyers and New Jersey leads the nation in number of toxic waste dumps? A: New...

By pgeer

Featured 17 years ago

How to Go to Heaven

A teacher was testing the children in her Sunday School class to see if they understood the concept of getting to Heaven. She asked them, "If I...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Rearrange The Letters

DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

The Mens Room

In the men's bathroom, an accountant, a lawyer and a cowboy were standing side-by-side using the urinal. The accountant finished, zipped up...

By anjahl

Featured 17 years ago

2 Nuns and a Blind Man

Two young nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even one...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Stripper vs Waitress

Q: What is the difference between a waitress who works in a strip club and a stripper? A: Two weeks.

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Smart Salesman

A neatly dressed salesman stopped a man in the street and asked - "Sir, would you like to buy a a bottle of this mouthwash for...

By gooberman86

Featured 17 years ago

Bee Sting

A wife comes home from playing golf with her friends. How was your day? her husband asks. It was just awful, she replies. I got...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Sick Notes

These are real notes written by parents in an ALABAMA school district. Spellings have been left intact. 1. My son is under a doctor's care...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Choking Boy

A man is walking through the mall with his teen-age son. The son is tossing a quarter up in the air and catching it between his teeth. On one...

By ebaum

Featured 17 years ago

Creative Writing

A university creative writing class was asked to write a concise essay containing these four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery. The...

By 24scoot

Featured 17 years ago

Redneck Jedi

You might be a Redneck Jedi if: * Your Jedi robe is camouflage. * You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light. * At...

By WIIWARRIOR

Featured 17 years ago

A Democrat and a Puppy

What's the difference between a democrat and a puppy? At least a puppy stops whining after a while.

By SinnFein

Featured 17 years ago

10 Things not 2 say on your anniversary

10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking. 9. Today is our what? 8. Okay, let's celebrate, but do we...

By aablueangel

Featured 17 years ago

Misc text - jokes

Retiree

Ponderisms

Strong Man

Boiling Eggs

Good Journalism

Wal-Marts in Iraq

Stolen Motor Bike

Little Billy

White House

Politically Correct Feminine Terminology

Entering Heaven

Lawyers and Toxic Waste

How to Go to Heaven

Rearrange The Letters

The Mens Room

2 Nuns and a Blind Man

Stripper vs Waitress

Smart Salesman

Bee Sting

Sick Notes

Choking Boy

Creative Writing

Redneck Jedi

A Democrat and a Puppy

10 Things not 2 say on your anniversary

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