fear and my inner child

I noticed something funny today. Every somewhat malicious or at least somewhat selfish thing I've ever done or thought about doing has been born of the insecurity I carry around because of some things that hapened when I was a child. I won't be discussing those things, because they're private and irrelevant to my point. The important thing is because of what hapened I carry around in my subconscious what amounts to a child. he's entirely afraid of everyone and everything and he has a never ending completely unfulfillable desire for affection that he would do anything to try and fill. Even though I'm grown and married I still carry him around with me. And sometimes his fear gets to be too much and I think about listeneing to him. Every unreasonable thing I do is his idea, every time I hurt someone, it's because he was afraid. I'm begining to think yoda had a point. maybe fear is the path to the dark side. Maybe every time someone harms another sentient being, it's only because they're deeply afraid inside. The idea has merit to it, I feel like I can trace all the worlds suffering back to someone's fear. mostly men, because men don't know how to deal with thier fear without anger and hatred. what is everyone's thoughts on this?

Uploaded 07/06/2008
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