So this morning I was thirsty, so I threw on one of my bf's soccer jerseys and a pair of old oil stained work jeans, and wandered my way over to the local Timmies for a delicious Iced Capp.
So I'm walking back home with my $2.50 drink, minding my own business, when I walk past a parking lot. There's a guy, he's in a dark family style minivan, who innocently appears to be waiting for me to walk by so he can get out onto the street and bring his kid's their lunches or something, when out of no where he says "That's a nice little ass you got there". Please keep in mind, that you coudn't see my ass.... and I didn't have the whore paint on... so I dunno where this guy got this bright idea.
Now with me only finishing half of my wake up caffine, I was still miserable, and really not looking for any attention from anyone. But this guy just made my day. If you follow any of my comments or submissions, you'll know that there are only a few that go unanswered. But, I was in no mood for conversation, so I turned around took one last sip and threw my now $1.25 worth of beverage at his pedophile grin. It was so liberating! The lid and straw flew through the air as if they were doves at a wedding. The main contents sloshed up the side of his van like Amy Winehouse's eyeliner after a night of partying. I didn't see where the cup went, but I assume that it entered his van, and got all over him and his cum incrusted interior. I never did see him leave the parking lot, and he never did say anything after that.
My only regret; not being able to see him tell his wife or babies mamma about his encounter with me and my Iced Capp. All I can say, it was the best $2.50 I've ever spent. I only hope that I get to experience another uplifting distraction from every day life, as I did today.