How to have sex with a zombie.
Howdy Bloggites. I assume you are reading this blog .My assumption is right. But now you are asking yourselves "How do I have sex with a zombie? Wont i get infected with the Z virus?" The answer is simple timmy. Not if you follow this guide.
1.Allways bring protection. I mean an axe....Oh yea and maybe a bat....and condoms...
2.Wine dine but dont 69 Your zombie girly. You can get infected or worse.Have Your penis bitten off.
3.zombie bitches love cuddleing.But they consider eating brains cuddleing.So In this circumstance it is ok not to want to cuddle.
4.Treat all zombie fems like they are from staten island. That means use a condom.and then bag em....and by Bag em I mean sever her head and place it in a zip lock
5.zombie dames are cheap dates, But ammo is very costly....So I suggest you get one zombabe and keep her tied to a tree in a secure area.
6.Keep in shape, zombitches will laugh if you cant beat them into submission. And it will ruin your self esteem.much like a jersey girl.
7. Ok last one. You can effectivly make a harmless zombwhore. But you must remove her teeth ,arms,legs, and nose. The reason is so you have an extra hole.Much like jersey women........ Think about it....
Ok I am off to fix the island.Zombies dont die by themselves...?? do they ? i mean they are dead right? I need to do more research...
Matt the leader of the zombies. Now with more Wowzaaz..