I'm transmitting this to you through divine intervention to let you know I was raptured.  I tried to tell all of you morons that you should treat each other better, but NOOOooooo!  You wouldn't listen.  Now you're going to have to suffer through the tribulation for being such enormous jerks.  Now you will have to suffer the boils, the famine, the... well, you know.  All the pestilence that was listed in the bible.  I can hardly wait to come down from the clouds with my holy sword and chop off your heads and throw you into the lake of fire.  I can hardly wait to hear you asking for that drop of water that Jesus won't let me give you.  Yeah, He knows I'm a softy and would take pity on you, but it's no more mister nice guy.  You went one toke over the line.