Top
Advertisement

2111

My predictions for humanity, the Earth, technology, and porn in the next 100 years.

· The Information Age will end.

 The Information Age will culminate into all information being conveyed over a singular wireless media of multiple streams, all being processed for various uses on the fly. Stalking will be incredibly easy, thanks to a trend jointly started today by Facebook and me. Katie C. won't know what hit her.

Computational power will be less of a hindrance and the focus will drastically change to using it in meaningful ways. This is already well underway, such as dildo MP3 players. (Google that shit. No joke.)

Porn will probably take over sex for most people. (Edit: I think it already has.)

· The Transportation Age will begin.

Energy storage will be key to traveling around the globe will be far easier and it will not be uncommon for people to work in a country on another continent, albeit not for most. This energy storage will likely be a safe radioactive isotope harnessed like a chemical battery, or some as-yet undiscovered acid we'll find in Lindsey Lohan's urine samples.

Flying cars will not be common, but aircraft that are automated will be, and there will be a new category of aircraft between general aviation and personal vehicles that fly preset routes and cost within the realm of a common worker. They will be used for trips more than 50 miles or so.

Road cars will also be automated. Road Head will be far less exciting, and far more common.

· Medical Advancements

The human life expectancy will increase to 100 years, and the oldest living person will reach 150. Hugh Hefner will probably be that guy.

· China and Asia.

China will collapse politically, and emerge as a quasi-capitalist society, and then take over as the world's most powerful superpower in history. Then they will elect a guy from Kenya as President and it will all go to shit again.

· Arab World

The Arabs will shift into high technology and production. Oil will still be a major income in the middle East, but it will drop down to #2 or #3 for most Arab countries, with 97% of oil production being distributed by the world's largest oil company: KY.

Israel and Palestine will remain at odds for decades, and will only come to a resolution under a scenario where an Arab country goes to war with Israel on behalf of Palestine. Most likely only to occur during a European crisis of it's own. Like a gay flu plague emerging from France. Wear masks or Israelis will die!!!

· North America

America will not collapse, but will economically withdraw from the superpower that it is now as it reaches closer to a socialist state. It will be stable, but past it's prime, and not drastically wealthy, sorta like Fabio.

Mexico will have a civil revolution. The entire world will feel the effects, -or lack thereof- when beans cease to be exported for a year or two.

Canada will still be making syrup and paper. And gay people. And gay people covered in syrup and paper. (OMG that could be called Gay-Maché! Copyright RJM 2011)

· War

A nuclear bomb will detonate in a crowded city, by a egocentric ruler, but will be delivered discretely, not dropped from a military aircraft. My guess is it will be from an African nation and detonate in Europe. SO hoping for France, but one could only be so lucky.

· Space

We will have a common space tourism industry and first-class space flights across the globe hundreds of times a day. The Mile-High Club will be an old joke. Man will visit the moon every day like they visit Paris Hilton's vagina. Mars will remain beyond the scope of casual tourism, but not by all. Basically, Mars is Anne Hathaway's vagina.

· Religion

Religion will still be a strong influence on a large portion of people, but nothing like the past or present. Less than 25% of the world will consider themselves to be religious, with the largest shift being in Muslims. Scientology will die off all in one fell swoop, exactly one day after KoolAid and Nike both have their best single-day in sales ever.

· Environment

The focus will shift from the air to land use. Farming will change drastically, and probably shift into indoor systems that rely more on man-made power (likely nuclear) rather than the sun in the western countries. Every basement-dwelling pot producer in America will be seen as a visionary.

The globe will be slightly warmer than today, but not by nearly what Al Gore says it will be.

Al Gore will still be showing slides from 2002 at junior college campuses anywhere that hasn't yet banned him.

· World Politics

A Socialist Party will emerge in the United States. The party's leader will be a Black Panther and former President.

Europe will have a major economic depression and China will gain from it. Europe will start talking Chinese and stop talking Europonese or whatever.
12
Ratings
  • 575 Views
  • 13 Comments
  • 0 Favorites
  • Flag
  • Flip
  • Pin It

13 Comments

  • Advertisement