1. Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

2.You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

3.Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is

4.It looks light your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork

5.Dumbass

6.If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid

7.You must be the arithmetic man; you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance.

8.Do you have to leave so soon? I was just about to poison the tea.

9.We all sprang from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.

10. I hear when you were a child your mother wanted to hire somebody to take care of you, but the mafia wanted too much.