In a week defined by long, pained discussions surrounding proper etiquette in nearly every facet of life — my girl’s girl ass will *always* reply to a compliment with a compliment, no matter what New York Magazine‘s ass has to say about it — Twitter user @jstrappedhole (nice) took to the platform with yet another very important lesson in manners … specifically for those partaking in the beloved pastime of gay orgies.



“Sex club etiquette: Tops, if you're f**king a btm [sic] for 10 min and there are other men standing around jerking their boners, step aside,” they wrote, adding the important clarification that these rules specifically apply “if you don't intend on cumming.” “Let another top have their turn,” they continued. “If no one jumps in, then resume f**king. But don't hog bottoms in public areas.”



Despite the assertion of self-described “big-assed #cumdump” @jstrappedhole’s post, it seems several Twitter users begged to differ.


Alongside asking for bottoms to have a goddamn say in the usage of their various holes — “Or we could not talk about bottoms as though they're objects to be used, but actual people with autonomy and the ability to say smash or pass,” quipped @dkbritt85 — others, including @_Sir_Pig_, had serious qualms with @jstrappedhole’s argument.



“Not everybody is going for quantity. It’s not hogging bottoms just because voyeurs or creepers are jerking in proximity” they explained, noting that he tends to “defer to the bottom in this case.”


“If we’ve clicked, they may not want somebody else to ‘have a turn,’ even if other tops are waiting,” he explained.


Yet beyond the ever-important concept of Bottom’s Rights, others, like @theparisbear explained their appreciation for a more anarchical approach when it comes to getting it on in public.


“Nah. No such thing in sex club etiquette,” they penned. “In certain specific types of parties where bottoms are known to be here to be used and shared, yes ok. Otherwise, that's a bogus take because you're taking your particular desires and trying to make them a general rule.”


So despite Paul Hollywood’s recurring icy glares on The Great British Bake Off, it seems there truly is something worse than a soggy bottom — a hoggy top.