It’s a tale of unlikely friendship, squirrels, and a whole lot of porn … the latter one being respective from the other two, of course.
When New York City-based engineer Mark Longo found himself rescuing — and ultimately adopting — an orphaned baby squirrel a few years back, little did he know his companion would skyrocket him to internet fame … and landing him a reputation as one of OnlyFans’ nuttiest creators.
"I released him in the backyard, and a day and a half later, I found him sitting on my porch, missing half his tail. So here I am, balling my eyes out, like I failed you as your human," he told USA Today of how he attempted to release Peanut, who he bottle-fed for eight months after his mother died in an accident.
Upon seeing each other, he continued, he knew the squirrel was no longer cut out for the outdoors. "I kind of opened the door, he ran inside,” he continued. “That was the last of Peanut's wildlife career."
While one career may have ended during that fateful interaction, another one began for Longo — one involving posting lots of nutty videos. As he began amassing followers on his shared Instagram account with Peanut, he decided to take a detour from both his wholesome pet content and STEM career, experimenting with OnlyFans to the delight of his down-bad followers.
Best friends for life ️ pic.twitter.com/MdzuoJXkvE— B&S (@_B___S) November 1, 2023
“Finding out that this guy made a full HOG OUT *nlyf*ns after leveraging his successful squirrel page following was crazy,” @itskindaover captioned a retweet of a now-viral supercut of the pair.
“Proud of him,” they added.“Got me gooned out too.”
But regardless of whether you’re envious of his body, his squirrel or both, one thing is certain: as @dyslexXtHiCc so aptly put it,“This is my dream and I am nothing but resentful seeing a man live it.”