Though the fact that everybody poops may serve as the titular inspiration for every dad’s favorite children’s book, one woman managed to evidently miss the memo, heading to TikTok with a look at her — admittedly relatable — inner monologue while on a toilet paper run.


“Hey shitty arse!” A voiceover can be heard above comedian @dimplestilskin’s viral TikTok, one captioned “what I assume people think of me when they see me buy toilet paper.”


@dimplestilskin Im the main character #funny #jokes #laugh #comedy ♬ original sound - Dimplestilskin


“Oh my god, she poos!” the voiceovers continued atop footage of her walking through a grocery store, TP presumably in tow. “Here’s pissy knickers now! She should just wear nappies!”


Though the world may never know whether or not they’ll be judged for stocking up on rolls, one thing is certain: We will always have to suffer alone. To paraphrase TikTok commenter @brianod12345, we have never seen anyone picking up TP at the same time we are … and probably never will.