Police have apprehended yet another asshole with a gun. Late last month, Indiana resident Christopher Boyd was driving around when he was stopped by police for having an obscured license plate.


A few problems lay ahead for Boyd. First, he was carrying a bag of Percocets (cops don’t like that). Second, Boyd was an ex-convict, which legally meant that he wasn’t allowed to have a gun. That wasn’t a problem, he said, as he told police that he was not carrying a firearm — he just, uh, had a little trouble walking.



“After Boyd was transported to the county jail, he was observed ‘walking with a limp and appeared to be clenching his buttocks when he walked,’ according to the report,” reads a piece from Fox 5 Atlanta.


Needless to say, police were suspicious of Boyd. As a result, they very carefully broached the subject of “do you have anything shoved up your butt?” Boyd affirmed that he did not.


Not exactly believing the man, police strip-searched him, immediately finding two plastic bags of pot “tucked next to Boyd’s scrotum.” When they approached his rear-end, Boyd refused to comply — and so, an officer removed his pants to reveal a Smith & Wesson pistol sticking out of his bottom. Not one to shoot from the hip, it seems.



For context, the Fox 5 piece notes that the pistol is “about five inches long” (big enough to get the job done, I’m told), and that it was unclear whether the gun was loaded. Regardless, the police weren’t thrilled about the bum gun discovery, and so, they threw Boyd in jail on “multiple felony drug, gun and trafficking charges.”


No word on what the cops did with the gun, though if you buy anything from an Indiana police auction in the next few months, you might want to give it a good cleaning just in case.